A String Cheese
by thebakery
Summary: A story that my younger cousin wanted me to post for her. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE: Love at First Sight

He came in a pack of twelve. I think we bought him at Albertsons, but I'm not sure. My mom was buying cupcakes for my soccer team's bake sale later that day. We were arguing about which color frosting to buy. I wanted green, to match our jersey color. My mom wanted white, because she's boring like that. We both knew who was right. Obviously me.

Anyway, after causing a riot in the bakery aisle, I suggested we bake them ourselves and buy every color of frosting available so the kids could pick what they want. She agreed. We retreated to the dairy section in the back of the store to get some milk. After having such a long, tiring dispute, it was natural that I would be extremely hungry.

"Hey mom!"

"Yes?"

"Can we buy some of this…. cheese?"

"Hang on, let me get my coupon booklet out.." She fumbled through her purse. My mom was like that. She spent half our shopping trips trying to look for different ways to save money. She probably _enjoyed_ it. And had dreams about it. I swear. "Oh, here it is. Sure, honey! What's the name of the brand?"

"String E. Cheese," I said. I probably did not know it at the time, but that was the name I would later be chanting in my sleep all night. It was the most perfect name in the whole entire world. Well, other than my name. Ailuv Tweet.

We took him home with us after stopping at the library for what seemed like hours (I hate libraries. They promote reading). The bake sale was in two hours, so we got to work on the cupcakes. That's when it happened. Well, I should probably tell you how I got there…

I advanced toward the location of the refrigerator, each step as light as a feather but at the same time, heavy with passion. I was wearing my gold ballet flats with the plastic rhinestones because they matched my eyes. Well kind of. The shoes made cute little squeaking noises on the wooden floor. I just _loved _those shoes. SO adorable.

Well anyway I stopped when I was about 6.24 inches from the white door of the fridge. Don't ask me how I knew the distance – It's natural for me. In fact, a lot of things are natural for me. Like my ability to burp the alphabet, Yankee Doodle, Old McDonald, and pretty much every children's song. You name it.

I could have made my estimate more accurate, but I was so determined to open that door, to see a new world where things would not be judged by how skinny or pretty they were, but how many calories they had. This also proves how amazing he is. I later found out, by reading the back of the packet he came in, that he only had about 60 calories. Dear Cheese, I love you for being so perfect for me and my diet. Love, Mrs. Cheese.

I slowly, sweetly wrapped my fingers around the door handle, and pulled it open with all my strength. After my eyes had adjusted to the bright florescent lights shining down upon everything like stage lights, I saw something I had not expected.

First, let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Ailuv Tweet, and I'm sixteen years old. Actually, my full name is Ailuv Tweet Chiiz (Pronounced CH-EE-Z), but it takes too long to write out five more letters so I just dropped my last name.

I have brown hair and brown eyes. One time, when I was in third grade, a boy told me my eyes reminded him of a little muddy pond in his backyard. I was flattered. Oh, I just LOVE ponds. They are SO adorable.

As you already know, I also love to play soccer with my soccer team. The funny thing is, the rest of my team are like, five year olds! I'm already in grade school! Well, I think it's called High School or something hard to remember like that. I don't really know. But I think the coach placed me on this team to be the leader. I was born a leader in every way, and I'm glad people recognize that!

My favorite thing to do is bake. Last Christmas, my great uncle Iyam Fatt gave me an Easy Bake machine! He wrapped it up so nicely in newspaper comics from the week before that I almost couldn't unwrap it, I felt so bad. When I finally had the guts to rip it open, I almost fainted from happiness. Actually, I think I did faint. I remember my mom telling me that they called an ambulance and went to the emergency room while I was unconscious. Oh, goodie. One more thing to cross off on my "Been There, Done that" list!

I was obsessed with Easy Bake for quite some time. I hugged it every day on my way to school, and knew the User's Manual by heart. By April, I was pretty much a Master Chef. In fact, I asked everyone at school to call me Chef Tweet, but no one listened. They were probably trying to help me protect my identity. Like, from the paparazzi.

Anyway, as I looked into the refrigerator, I saw that the cookies I had baked last week were GONE! I was shocked. Then I hyperventilated, and transitioned into the series of different types of seizures I always had during traumatic events. I had spent so much time lovingly icing them in rainbow colors. I was furious. I searched the whole fridge, including the shelves on the door. That was when I first saw him.

From the moment I laid my eyes on him I knew he was mine. I knew it in my heart, from the bottom of my soul. The way he was leaning back against the refrigerator door made his skin tone gleam like a polished apple from the produce section. He was as bright and as yellow as the sun. Don't get me wrong; He wasn't Asian, or at least I didn't think so. But he attracted me like a block of cheddar cheese attracts mice. Actually, he was cheddar cheese. His name was Mr. String E. Cheese- my one and only true love.

CHAPTER TWO: Not Just an Ordinary Cheese

My heart skipped a beat as I struggled to catch my breath. Was it my imagination, or did he just wink at me? I gasped as I realized that the cheese had eyes. They sparkled like the glitter glue that somehow always ended up underneath my fingernails.

I nearly fainted when I saw that he had a mouth, a nose, ears, arms, legs, EVERYTHING. But what really got me was when he spoke. His voice was like a thousand Kazoos playing together in perfect harmony.

"Where am I?" he squeaked, in a high-pitched yet incredibly masculine voice.

"I don't know," I said, feeling a little woozy. But what matters is that you're with me right now, I added to myself.

He looked frightened, so I delicately picked him up off the shelf and cradled him in my arms.

"Wh-who are you?" he asked. I was thrilled. He wanted to know MY NAME! He certainly wasn't going to be disappointed. My name was perfect. Just like me.

"Ailuv Tweet. Who are you?" I said excitedly.

"String E. Cheese," he said, beautifully. Ahh… so that would be my new name. Mrs. String E. Cheese. It was perfect. Just like him. Just like us.

I smiled down at him and adjusted my grip so he could see my neon blue nails in the light. Perhaps they would please him, because the color of cheese, yellow, and the color of my nails, blue, were opposites on the color wheel. If he did notice this, he did an excellent job of pretending not to. I sighed. Only I could get such a talented husband. Not just a model, but an actor as well!

"Um.. can you drive me back to the grocery store?" Cheese asked.

"Absolutely. Well, after my soccer thing. Then we can go to the park and hang out there until nightfall!" I was good at this. Stargazing – SO adorable!

"Uh… yeah sure whatever," he said nonchalantly. I loved how he was trying to act like he didn't care. He was trying to impress me! Well, two can play that game.

I stuffed him into my pocket carelessly, but still showing Cheese my love for him. I was so glad that I was wearing my lime green bell-bottom jeans. My grandmother told me that ALL the guys love those. I had glued rhinestones onto them to match my shoes which matched my eyes – sort of.

The bake sale seemed to go on for eternity. It was okay though, because first of all, Cheese was there with me. Second of all, I was the ultimate Thumb War Champion. I was so good that no one wanted to battle me, so I played with Cheese instead. It was so sweet that he lost on purpose for me despite the fact that I knew he was also a champion at Thumb Wars. I accidentally ripped him in half, but I always keep a brand new roll of neon pink duct tape in my Collector's Dora the Explorer Rare Edition Backpack so it was all okay.

When the sale finally ended, I leaped up and tangoed with Cheese all the way back to my car. I had to start up the engine, so I propped him up on the seat next to me and buckled his seatbelt for him.

"First we're going home, and then we'll go out!" I said happily as I pulled out of the parking lot.

I turned on the radio so I could show Cheese how good I was at multitasking. He gazed at me with his deep blue eyes that kind of resembled fungus. This attracted me so much I could hardly believe it.

I sang along with the Jonas Brothers to Burnin' Up. "OMG. This is one of my FAVORITE songs!" I cried. Little did I know, this song would later become OUR SONG. You know, like the kind that old couples claim was playing at a nightclub during their first kiss.

When we finally got home and the song ended (unlike my endless love for String E. Cheese), I carefully unbuckled his seatbelt and brought him inside. His body jiggled and rolled like jello. I giggled at the thought of this. Imagine falling in love with jello. What a silly idea.

I was so anxious to show him my room that I tripped while running up the stairs. "Honey! Are you okay?" yelled my mom from her office upstairs.

"Yeah, mom. I'm good." I looked around frantically for my friend. Or (although he did not know this yet) boyfriend. Fiance. Husband. All the better.

He was there, right beside me. That was when I knew we would never leave each other. String Cheese would always be there to protect me. I gently picked him up from where I had dropped him and attached his body together and jogged up the stairs.

"Hey mom." I leaned against the frame of the doorway.

"Oh hi, honey. How was the bake sale?"

"Boring," I sighed, trying to imagine what it would be like to be an acrobat.

"What's that you have in your hand?"

"Oh, Mr. String E. Cheese?" I asked, holding him up in front of her face.

I heard a tiny voice.

"That's not my name!" cried Cheese.

I laughed. "It's okay, String E., its just my mom. She's safe. You'll be okay here."

My mom stared at me. "Why are you talking to yourself?"

"…. I'm not.."

She turned back to the computer and said, "Very funny."

I looked down into Cheese's scared blue eyes. He started to sniffle and cry. How manly, I thought. I took him to my bedroom.

He spoke again. "Really. That's not my name…"

I put him on my bed and kneeled down so we could see eachother, eye to eye. "Then what is?" I said curiously. I noticed that the neon pink duct tape was starting to peel off.

He looked around nervously to make sure the paparazzi weren't near. "It's kind of a strange name… I don't think you'll – "

I cut him off. "You can tell me anything."

He stared at me, wide eyed. "Uh okay.. My name is…. Mary."

I could not believe my ears. I did not think there would be a more beautiful name than String E. Cheese, but here it was. Mary. The one name every girl loved. So masculine, just like him. It was like a dream come true. (Now the only thing that I needed to make my life perfect was a unicorn. A real one.)

"Mrs. Mary," I said softly to myself.

"What?!" he said, confusedly. Ah, I thought. Playing Hard To Get. That would soon be over once we got engaged. Well, officially.

There was one problem though. Wedding pictures. Where was my camera?

I looked around my room. My camera was precious to me. Almost as precious as my collection of Asian Cabbage Patch dolls (The reason they were all Asian was obviously because my past mind knew, subconsciously, that I would later marry someone with yellow skin. Yet another reason why I should be voted student body president – I mean, how many times in one lifetime do you meet an actual psychic?).

I found my camera underneath a pile of Chuck E. Cheese birthday hats. Oh, I just LOVE Chuck E. Cheese. So classy, yet so fun!

"Come on, Chee-Mary." I caught myself. "You sit in front of this painting I made when I was five, and I'll sit next to you." I held out the camera, lenses facing us. "3, 2, 1, CHEESE!" I said enthusiastically. I added emphasis on the "cheese" part because I knew Mary would like that.

I turned the camera around and looked at the picture we just took. I looked perfect, like I always do when I wear my purple sombrero. I looked for Mary. He looked small next to me, and his features – HIS FEATURES – WERE GONE.

My heart stopped. I closed my eyes, trying to process what I saw. "I know what you are," I said, trying to make my voice sound like Kristen Stewart's.

Mary waited for me to say something. I looked back at him, longingly, for what seemed like a few minutes.

"Say it!" he shrieked. "Say it OUT LOUD." I pretended that he had a deep husky voice in my mind to make things seem more dramatic.

I took a deep breath, looked deep into his familiar eyes, and said (theatrically, of course), "Unicorn."

CHAPTER THREE:

He turned away from me. "How did you find out?" he growled.

I knew it. Now all my wishes were fulfilled. Ever since I was a little girl, no, ever since _last month,_ I was obsessed with unicorns. I bought cute little coloring books, read picture books about unicorns, and even bought unicorn shirts from the kids section. (I had to buy plus-sizes because apparently the manufacturer didn't think that maybe adults wanted Littlest Pet Shop clothes too. How stupid of them.) And now I, just an average (but extremely intelligent and not to mention gorgeous) sixteen year old girl, had my very own unicorn!

"Well, the way you looked at me – like you wanted me to- to-" I stumbled, searching for the most attractive-sounding words.

"To what?"

"_Pet_ you." I stretched out the syllables.

He gasped. "YOU'RE PSYCHIC." (What did I tell you?)

I tossed my soft, luxurious hair. "Yes, Mary. Wanna go to the park?" I asked, quickly losing interest. I admired us in the mirror. The mirror cracked and fell on the floor. What a good sign, I thought to myself.

"I don't know, Ailuv..."

"WANNA GO OR NOT?" I yelled impatiently. Yelling and arguing was an important part of being a married couple. I might as well practice now.

"OKAY, okay!" he held up his skinny arms in defeat. Mary actually had really toned muscular arms. He was just hiding them as part of his disguise. Oh did I tell you? He also works for the CIA. Hot model, handsome actor, and crime-fighting spy. What other surprises did this unicorn have for me?

When we got to the park, I put on my fake moustache to be mysterious and avoid any evil forces. I scanned the park for any dark, sinister looking things, or people with large boxes or cases. (Things I Learned At Band Camp: 1. People carrying large instrument cases probably sell cheap drugs. 2. Never use your saxophone as a baseball bat.)

The coast was clear, so I sat down at a small wooden picnic table under an oak tree. The moon in the sky looked like a gorgonzola.

I suddenly remembered something. I pulled Mary out of my plaid satchel with the striped cross


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO: Not Just an Ordinary Cheese

My heart skipped a beat as I struggled to catch my breath. Was it my imagination, or did he just wink at me? I gasped as I realized that the cheese had eyes. They sparkled like the glitter glue that somehow always ended up underneath my fingernails.

I nearly fainted when I saw that he had a mouth, a nose, ears, arms, legs, EVERYTHING. But what really got me was when he spoke. His voice was like a thousand Kazoos playing together in perfect harmony.

"Where am I?" he squeaked, in a high-pitched yet incredibly masculine voice.

"I don't know," I said, feeling a little woozy. But what matters is that you're with me right now, I added to myself.

He looked frightened, so I delicately picked him up off the shelf and cradled him in my arms.

"Wh-who are you?" he asked. I was thrilled. He wanted to know MY NAME! He certainly wasn't going to be disappointed. My name was perfect. Just like me.

"Ailuv Tweet. Who are you?" I asked excitedly.

"String E. Cheese," he said, beautifully. Ahh… so that would be my new name. Mrs. String E. Cheese. It was perfect. Just like him. Just like us.

I smiled down at him and adjusted my grip so he could see my sparkly purple nails in the light. Perhaps they would please him, because the color of cheese, yellow, and the color of my nails, purple, were opposites on the color wheel. If he did notice this, he did an excellent job of pretending not to. I sighed.

Only I could get such a talented husband. Not just a model, but an actor as well!

"Um.. can you drive me back to the grocery store?" Cheese asked.

"Absolutely. Well, after my soccer thing. Then we can go to the park and hang out there until nightfall!" I was good at this. Stargazing – SO adorable!

"Uh… yeah sure whatever," he said nonchalantly. I loved how he was trying to act like he didn't care. He was trying to impress me! Well, two can play that game.

I stuffed him into my pocket carelessly, but still showing Cheese my love for him. I was so glad that I was wearing my lime green bell-bottom jeans. My grandmother told me that ALL the guys love those. I had glued rhinestones onto them to match my shoes which matched my eyes – sort of.

The bake sale seemed to go on for eternity. It was okay though, because first of all, Cheese was there with me. Second of all, I was the ultimate Thumb War Champion. I was so good that no one wanted to battle me, so I played with Cheese instead. It was so sweet that he lost on purpose for me despite the fact that I knew he was also a champion at Thumb Wars. I accidentally ripped him in half, but I always keep a brand new roll of neon pink duct tape in my Collector's Dora the Explorer Rare Edition Backpack so it was all okay.

When the sale finally ended, I leaped up and tangoed with Cheese all the way back to my car. I had to start up the engine, so I propped him up on the seat next to me and buckled his seatbelt for him.

"First we're going home, and then we'll go out!" I said happily as I pulled out of the parking lot.

I turned on the radio so I could show Cheese how good I was at multitasking. He gazed at me with his deep blue eyes that kind of resembled fungus. This attracted me so much I could hardly believe it.

I sang along with the Jonas Brothers to Burnin' Up. "OMG. This is one of my FAVORITE songs!" I cried. Little did I know, this song would later become OUR SONG. You know, like the kind that old couples claim was playing at a nightclub during their first kiss.

When we finally got home and the song ended (unlike my endless love for String E. Cheese), I carefully unbuckled his seatbelt and brought him inside. His body jiggled and rolled like jello. I giggled at the thought of this. Imagine falling in love with jello. What a silly idea.

I was so anxious to show him my room that I tripped while running up the stairs. "Honey! Are you okay?" yelled my mom from her office upstairs.

"Yeah, mom. I'm good." I looked around frantically for my friend. Or (although he did not know this yet) boyfriend. Fiance. Husband. Even better.

He was there, right beside me. That was when I knew we would never leave each other. String Cheese would always be there to protect me. I gently picked him up from where I had dropped him and attached his body together and jogged up the stairs.

"Hey mom." I leaned against the frame of the doorway.

"Oh hi, honey. How was the bake sale?"

"Boring," I sighed, trying to imagine what it would be like to be an acrobat in a circus.

"What's that you have in your hand?"

"Oh, Mr. String E. Cheese?" I asked, holding him up in front of her face.

I heard a tiny voice.

"That's not my name!" cried Cheese.

I laughed. "It's okay, String E., its just my mom. She's safe. You'll be okay here."

My mom stared at me. "Why are you talking to yourself?"

"…. I'm not.."

She turned back to the computer and said, "Very funny."

I looked down into Cheese's scared blue eyes. He started to sniffle and cry. How manly, I thought. I took him to my bedroom.

He spoke again. "Really. That's not my name…"

I put him on my bed and kneeled down so we could see eachother, eye to eye. "Then what is?" I said curiously. I noticed that the neon pink duct tape was starting to peel off.

He looked around nervously to make sure the paparazzi weren't near. "It's kind of a strange name… I don't think you'll – "

I cut him off. "You can tell me anything."

He stared at me, wide eyed. "Uh okay.. My name is…. Mary."

I could not believe my ears. I did not think there would be a more beautiful name than String E. Cheese, but here it was. Mary. The one name every girl loved. So masculine, just like him. It was like a dream come true. (Now the only thing that I needed to make my life perfect was a unicorn. A real one.)

"Mrs. Mary," I said softly to myself.

"What?!" he said, confusedly. Ah, I thought. Playing Hard To Get. That would soon be over once we got engaged. Well, officially.

There was one problem though. Wedding pictures. Where was my camera?

I looked around my room. My camera was precious to me. Almost as precious as my collection of Asian Cabbage Patch dolls (The reason they were all Asian was obviously because my past mind knew, subconsciously, that I would later marry someone with yellow skin. Yet another reason why I should be voted student body president – I mean, how often during one lifetime do you get to meet an actual psychic?).

I found my camera underneath a pile of Chuck E. Cheese birthday hats. Oh, I just LOVE Chuck E. Cheese. So classy, yet so fun!

"Come on, Chee-Mary." I caught myself in time. "You sit in front of this painting I made when I was five, and I'll sit next to you." I held out the camera, lenses facing us. "3, 2, 1, CHEESE!" I said enthusiastically. I added emphasis on the "cheese" part because I knew Mary would like that.

I turned the camera around and looked at the picture we just took. I looked perfect, like I always do when I wear my purple sombrero. I looked for Mary. He looked small next to me, and his features – HIS FEATURES – WERE GONE.

My heart stopped. I closed my eyes, trying to process what I saw. "I know what you are," I said, batting my eyelashes rapidly while trying to make my voice sound like Kristen Stewart's.

Mary waited for me to say something. I looked back at him, longingly, for what seemed like a few minutes.

"Say it!" he shrieked. "Say it OUT LOUD." I pretended that he had a deep husky voice in my mind to make things seem more dramatic.

I took a deep breath, looked deep into his familiar eyes, and said (theatrically, of course), "Unicorn."


End file.
